(excerpted, with permission, from Dr. Scott Mandelker's From Elsewhere: The ET Journal, Nov. 1995, vol. 1 no. 2)

After a recent lecture in Minnesota I was asked an interesting question by the wife of a man who knew he was an ET Wanderer. Sounding concerned, she first told me her husband is sure he is from elsewhere and has no more doubt. But afer this momentous discovery (which he'd suspected for many years) his life became more difficult, not less. His wife explained: it's been very hard for him to find something worthwhile to do on Earth, since a deep sense of "rootlessness" overcame him. In fact, she said, he had to "develop an interest in something here and train his mind to get excited about it"! Obviously, the knowledge of being extraterrestrial cut off his interest in human engagement, and dissolved any thrill he might have previously felt from being a part of society. As I told his wife, this is actually a common experience. It is simply an early phase of emotional re-adjustment.

Almost every Wanderer I interviewed in From Elsewhere: Being ET in America had a powerful sense of alienation at some point in their life. Usually it marked the beginning of their path: many people felt a strong sense of differentness during childhood, despite friends and a loving family. It usually accompanied a vague 'longing for the stars,' for true family, for a forgotten home. When the person reached adolescence, this persistent alienation was further compounded by a very practical terror: "how will I ever fit into the world and find something I want to do?" This issue is easily defined: it is the need for meaningful social integration. However, it's not so easily resolved.

How do you fit into a world you feel is not your own? And more than that, how do you participate in a society that might call you insane if you shared your beliefs, then label you a victim of delusion? This mis-fitting is far more complex than simply cross-cultural adjustment or living far from home. The Wanderer's alienation is like an identity badge on the heart, part of the very substance of all experience on Earth. It is not easily dismissed, nor should it be. This alienation is a flashing light above the doorway of our remembrance, as well as the cross we must bear as responsibility for the honor and privilege of serving a planet in such need of love and light. It is rarely comfortable...

When I discovered that extreme childhood alienation and differentness were common among Wanderers, I knew it would set off alarms among 'the experts.' With a conventional explanation for this most unconventional identity, psychological opinion runs something like this:

"they call themselves ETs because it provides comfort and self-importance, making painful feelings of social maladjustment easier to bear"

If you agree with this interpretation, you may conclude "there is no such thing as ET souls, only ordinary humans with ordinary emotional problems." This is the sceptic's position and it does have some merit. In some cases, I too agree.

Without doubt, psychological interpretations can't be proven. First of all, not everyone with alienation claims to be ET, and not all ETs felt such alienation. Just because a radical belief brings comfort and self-validation doesn't mean the belief was 'created' simply to make someone feel better. Not all Wanderers are comforted by recognition of being ET; some people feel more disoriented. It often brings more life-challenges.

So it's the old chicken-or-egg question: does childhood alienation create the need to imagine being from elsewhere, or does the reality of being an ET soul since birth naturally generate feelings of alienation? Neither psychologists nor believers can prove their point. However, there are far more important questions we need to ask:

Can psychological dynamics co-exist with transcendental reality? Does human psychology explain all facets of human experience?

Without going further into the dense thicket of debate, let me simply add this: more and more people tell me that the knowledge they've gained from subjective spritual knowing has greater value to them than the current beliefs of experts. Most of these people are also reasonable, intelligent and willing to listen to other views. Again, psychological explanations have their place, but they tell not the whole story. Are human beings deeper than human psychology?

As a teenager I often consulted the I Ching or Book of Changes, an ancient Chinese oracle system. In my innocence, I asked plainly: "Who am I?" (I actually imagined this question could be answered by a book!) Well, my innocence was well-received: this book could point towards self in all its depth. The 'answer' I received was Hexagram Number 56, Lu, The Wanderer. Only now do I realize how profound that answer was...

What the I Ching says about Lu (one of 64 six-lined image/symbols in the book) is relevant to that other type of Wanderer: the ET kind (and Walk-in as well). These ETs have certanly 'lost their home' (psychologists would add that they've lost their minds as well!). Moreover, Wanderers have also 'lost their greatness', which is much harder to accept: like eagles with clipped wings, they're full of vigor but unable to fly. The husband unwilling to return to 'normal society' after discovering his ET roots was probably suffering 'an exhaustion of greatness': the dull pain of knowing he is not who he used to be and the glory of Spirit he once was is now heavy and apparently beyond reach. No wonder they had to "train his mind to get excited" about social engagement!

So what's an ET to do about all of this? Really, the best advice would be to meditate every day--but how many of us will do it? Precluding this, it seems important to realize that alienation is normal and part of the landscape. I do admit the psychological dimension and agree that counseling can be very useful. But dealing with this alienation goes far beyond childhood experience and is part of the process of making peace with living on Earth for those who say they're ET. It's also a matter of self-acceptance: taking responsibility for spiritual longing and forging constructive activity. It usually results in some form of service to others.

If you do consider yourself a visitor, then realize that you chose to be here, it was neither accident nor punishment. Then ask: why did you choose to be here, and what might now bring you fulfillment? It's useless forcing yourself to get in step with society; far better to learn your own steps. Don't be afraid to feel different: if you really are, that's just the way it is.